This generation of young people in China is approaching blind dates the way they do "dating shows".
In recent years, the growing popularity of romance reality shows has not only generated trending topics online but also reflected the complex state of mind of young people today when it comes to personal relationships: they yearn for sincere love, yet often remain cautious, restrained, and hesitant due to practical factors.
This contradictory mindset makes it easier for them to feel a sense of connection in the emotional interactions of the show’s participants, achieving emotional resonance and projection. As many romance reality show viewers joke self-deprecatingly: “Watching others fall in love feels more heartfelt than being in a relationship myself.”
More notably, as online romance reality shows attract massive online traffic, a growing number of offline social activities modeled after “romance reality shows” have emerged. Some event planners use highly engaging slogans like “This time, be the protagonist of your own love story” to inspire young people’s willingness to participate, encouraging them to transform from “love spectators” in front of the screen to “love seekers” in real life.
This is not a mere replication of online trends, but a new solution for the younger generation to address “social isolation” and “anxiety about relationships and marriage.”
When Blind Dates Adopt the “Romance Reality Show” Veneer
Most people who have attended traditional blind dates organized by corporate trade unions or public welfare organizations are well aware of their traits: “strongly purpose-driven, rigid in process, and superficial in interaction.” Participants easily feel awkward and pressured during the experience.
On Xiaohongshu (Little Red Book), a netizen shared her experience of attending an “offline blind date event with 120 people.” According to her account, the age range of participants spanned from 20 to 45 years old, with a disorganized group composition and uneven quality of attendees. The self-introduction and game sessions alone took over an hour, leaving participants exhausted. When they finally moved on to the free chat session, conversations were often limited to the “three usual topics”: age, occupation, and hobbies. What made her even more uncomfortable was that the free chat throughout the event was almost appearance-oriented—only a few good-looking participants were surrounded by people chatting with them, while most others were left out in the cold. The netizen bluntly stated, “This kind of disorganized blind date is really not suitable for introverts; I got almost nothing out of three hours.”
Beyond group blind dates, the one-on-one meeting arranged by acquaintances also has obvious limitations. Although this approach is backed by a certain level of trust, both parties often fall into a cycle of “adding WeChat, forcing small talk, and ending awkwardly.” For people with weak social skills, the entire process can be agonizing, and it is easy to lose contact afterward because they cannot find topics for sustained communication.
However, since 2024, a number of offline social events themed around “offline romance reality shows” have emerged in many cities across the country. With their relaxed and innovative format, these events are gradually becoming a new choice for young people to break away from traditional blind date models and engage in emotional socializing. Behind young people’s active participation lies a shift in mindset: they no longer passively wait for love to come naturally, but step out of their narrow social circles and begin to seek new possibilities for their emotional lives.
According to observations by Jingzhe Research Institute, offline romance reality show events come in diverse forms. The most mainstream model involves selecting spacious, atmosphere-rich indoor venues or artistically designed spaces to create relaxed and enjoyable social parties. In addition, there are innovative types featuring comedy stand-up shows—for example, *Elope to the Moon* launched by Kaifan Comedy. This event not only designs rich interactive sessions for blind date participants but also specially opens audience seats, allowing the audience to both “watch the drama” on-site and join in impromptu interactions.
Previously, short-term romance reality show-style trips were quite popular. These trips usually take place in scenic, healing tourist cities like Dali. Throughout the trip, a team leader is assigned to guide the process, and a photographer documents interactions, creating unique memories for participants.
Offline romance reality show recruitment posts on Xiaohongshu
Despite differences in form, most of these offline events retain the classic segment framework of online romance reality shows in their core content design. A typical process includes ice-breaking games (to break the awkwardness of first meetings), opinion debates (to showcase personal values), collaborative tasks (to enhance rapport), and final “heartfelt choices.” Some events also innovatively incorporate the “light-up/keep-light” mechanism from *If You Are the One* (a popular Chinese dating show), adding drama and engagement to the segments.
The most prominent advantage of offline romance reality shows lies in their meticulous process design. Event organizers usually refer to the “task card” model of popular variety shows, pre-planning the direction of topic discussions, the rules of collaborative games, and even the guidance methods for free chat.
This highly structured design greatly reduces social uncertainty. Participants do not need to worry about awkward silences or taking the initiative to break the ice—they only need to follow the process to advance interactions. Even for events with relatively complex scenarios, such as short trips, there are clear segment guidelines, which significantly ease participants’ psychological burden. This stands in sharp contrast to traditional blind date events.
In comparison, through gamified and contextualized segment design, offline romance reality shows not only retain the purpose of blind dates but also endow socializing with fun, greatly reducing the awkwardness and pressure of traditional blind dates. This allows participants to engage in natural, unforced communication in a relaxed atmosphere.
Finding a Partner Is Not the Only Goal
Judging from the design logic of current offline romance reality show events, while promotions highlight the positioning of “aiming to find a partner,” they also emphasize diverse attributes such as “relaxed socializing,” “expanding social circles,” and “weekend stress relief.” In essence, these events are not traditional blind date platforms, but more like relaxed dating spaces created for strangers.
Whether in venue decoration or the fun interactions in segment design, efforts seem to be made to downplay the utilitarianism of “having to find a partner.” Therefore, even if no couples are formed in the end, most participants still feel the experience is enjoyable and worthwhile. As some planners interact with users on social platforms, they put it: “The main focus is on having fun.”
This relaxed design also aligns well with the mindset of young people when participating. Most of them do come with the expectation of finding a partner, but their core demand is actually to meet like-minded new friends, break out of narrow social circles, or even just find a relaxing, stress-relieving activity for their dull weekends. For them, finding a partner is more like a “pleasant surprise”; even if they fail to achieve this goal, they will not deny the value of the event, and instead often describe the experience as “worth the ticket price.”
Many participants’ genuine shares on social media also confirm this “low emphasis on purpose, high emphasis on experience” mindset. A netizen who described herself as “single since birth” shared that when she attended an offline romance reality show on the weekend, the final “mutual heartfelt selection” segment saw a lively scene where “everyone chose each other successfully.” In reality, however, most people made “kind choices” out of a “nice person mindset”—afraid that not choosing someone would embarrass them.
Nevertheless, even though she did not meet someone she was attracted to, she still recognized the organizer’s care and efforts. Many others sighed after the experience: “I originally came for finding a partner, but meeting many new friends is far better than just finding someone”; some even said bluntly, “The event experience was good, but there were no male guests I was attracted to. The chance of finding a partner through this kind of event is really slim.”
From the perspective of underlying needs, the popularity of offline romance reality shows reflects a shift in the social concepts of contemporary young people. On one hand, it accurately caters to young people’s “lazy socializing” mindset. Young people reject the sense of exhaustion in traditional blind dates and are tired of meaningless social interactions. Offline romance reality shows downplay purposefulness from the start and build a clear “social framework” for participants through pre-designed games, topics, and tasks—they only need to follow the process to interact naturally. This “no-brain” social model perfectly matches the demands of contemporary young people.
On the other hand, offline romance reality shows meet the younger generation’s high pursuit of “experience value.” For today’s young people, the core of consumption may no longer be limited to pursuing a specific outcome, but more about enjoying the emotional rewards and connection possibilities brought by the process itself. Therefore, as long as the process is fun or they meet friends worth continuing to interact with, the consumption is valuable.
According to observations by Jingzhe Research Institute, the ticket prices for current offline romance reality show events range from 50 to 300 yuan (including costs for props, materials, afternoon tea, etc.), which is roughly equivalent to the cost of daily leisure or social activities for most young people. Compared with popular lifestyle consumption options today, such as scripted murder games (live-action role-playing games) or stand-up comedy shows, offline romance reality shows also have a certain cost-effectiveness advantage.
In short, young people’s spending on participating in offline romance reality shows is not solely aimed at “finding a partner,” but at paying for both “the possibility of encountering love” and “a pleasant social experience.”
A Niche Celebration Amid the Hustle
However, it is worth noting that although this social model—combining emotional expectations and experience value—has gained popularity among young people, it has not truly reached the broader youth group.
Just like the participants in amateur romance reality shows such as *Heart Signal*, they seem “close to real life,” but in fact, most of them have high academic qualifications, decent jobs, and outstanding appearances, and are not “ordinary people” in the true sense. Offline romance reality show events follow a similar screening logic.
“A stable job and income” is just the basic threshold; many offline events tilt more obviously toward groups with “high academic qualifications and high quality” during recruitment. Even if some events claim that “junior college graduates and above are welcome to participate,” the disclosed participant information shows that the group is highly concentrated among graduates from 985/211 universities, overseas returnees, and people in a small number of occupations such as civil servants, state-owned enterprise employees, and financial practitioners. Some events even openly “screen by appearance” in their recruitment titles, giving priority to participants with better looks. After layers of screening, a relatively fixed, circle-based group of participants is finally formed.
This screening mechanism, on the surface, aims to clearly divide participants into circles, allowing people with similar educational backgrounds and career experiences to easily find common topics and reduce interaction barriers caused by cognitive differences. In reality, however, it inadvertently builds a “demographic barrier.” Those who do not meet the academic requirements, whose occupations are not on the “preferred list,” or whose appearance does not meet the screening criteria are often excluded as soon as they see the recruitment information. Even if events mention matching dimensions such as “hobbies,” these become secondary factors in the face of rigid conditions like academic background, occupation, and appearance—undoubtedly endowing offline romance reality shows with an inherent niche attribute.
In addition, for introverts who are not good at actively showcasing themselves in public, the experience of offline romance reality shows is also unfriendly, and it is even difficult for them to consider such events in the first place. Although these events have hosts to guide the process, most require quickly integrating into the group, actively expressing opinions in games and topic discussions, and interacting frequently with multiple strangers in a short period of time—scenarios that easily make introverts feel drained and constrained.
Therefore, the popularity of offline romance reality shows is more like an optimized solution for finding partners and socializing, offered by a group of pioneering young people through consumerism. It mainly serves young people who meet the “standards” in terms of educational background, professional status, and appearance, and who are adaptable to outgoing social scenarios.
There is no denying that it provides a new alternative to traditional blind date models, and it is lively and trendy enough. However, in terms of coverage and adaptability to different groups, it still remains a niche celebration.
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